Janez Janša | SLEEPING WITH PENGOVSKY

Janez Janša’s Letter To Ursula von der Leyen, Annotated

Oh, dear. Looks like it is that time of the year again. Birds migrate, flowers bloom and Slovenian PM Janez Janša writes letters to EU leaders. In this case, a letter to European Commission president Ursula von der Leyen.

Beggining of Janez Janša's letter to Ursula von der Leyen — *The letter, as published by the Slovenian governement’s Twitter account*

Unlike the last time around, Marshal Twito’s latest literary undertaking is mercifully light on maritime metaphors but heavy on manipulative bullshit and passive-aggressive abuse. This, of course, means it is time for a new installment of the developing sub-genre, pengovsky’s annotated readings of letters by the Glorious Leader.

Laying For Living

Poor Janez Janša, he just can’t seem to catch a break. No sooner did Slovenian PM see off a somewhat flaccid, though not unnerving no-confidence challenge by Karl Erjavec (more on the aftermath in the coming days), he already started another dumpster fire, this time following a not-so-flattering article by Politico Europe’s Lili Bayer on his love-hate relationship with the media. As in, how he loves to hate them.

Janez Janša railing against Politico Europe journalist on Twitter — Marshal Twito marshaling his minions

For all his professed pro-EU stance, the Glorious Leader seems to be remarkably inept at handling himself on the European stage. Which is, well, not ideal for a guy whose crowning achievement (as per his Twitter bio) was leading the EU Council for six months in 2008. And yet, just as he fucked up royally when he went to bat for his capo Viktor Orban over the rule of law last November, so did he land in a pile of flaming dog shit this week as he and his minions went after the Politico journalist.

Procedural Hardball in No-Confidence Motion

Last Wednesday (and not yesterday, as pengovsky originally assumed), was supposed to be the day of the clash of the titans. Or, at the very least, a clash of the tits, given the current political class in Muddy Hollows. Instead, Kar Erjavec withdrew his no-confidence motion against PM Janez Janša.

Slovenian parliament did not debate the no-confidence motion against PM Janez Janša this week. — *Original image via National Assembly (source)*

Technically, Komeback Karl made his move on account of Covid-19 infections and exposures on the opposition side of the aisle. Seeing as he was already four votes short of a majority, going in with two people down would make the already long odds virtually impossible. However, there was a larger game afoot, as well.

A Hope And A Prayer

It may not seem like it but it has been nearly eight years and four governments since Muddy Hollows last had to deal with a no-confidence vote. And before 2013, the only other time a no-confidence vote was mounted was in 1992. In short, a no-confidence vote is pretty fucking rare in this neck of the woods. Doubly so when the effort is led by Karl Erjavec, something pengovsky still can’t completely get his head around.

Be that as it may, today Komeback Karl, supported by LMŠ, SD, SAB and Levica parliamentary groups, filed the fifth no-confidence motion in the history of democratic Slovenia. Wait. Fifth? Pengovsky, you dumbass, you said it only happened in 1992 and 2013!? Well, allow me to elucidate with references to specifics…

Strange Bedfellows

Politics, as they say, makes for strange bedfellows. Doubly so in Muddy Hollows, where 2020 has, among other disasters, served the country with the notion of Karl Erjavec as a serious contender for the PM post. It’s not that Erjavec doesn’t have qualifications for the job, at least on paper. It’s that it wasn’t that long ago that people were willing to drown him in his own spit for what they correctly perceived as his self-centered, arrogant and destructive politicking at the expense of everyone else.

*DeSUS is *this* close to bailing on the Glorious Leader*

And now that DeSUS leadership has voted to quit the government of Janez Janša, Komeback Karl is being hailed as the last, best hope for Muddy Hollows to finally turn the corner in the fucking mess that is the second wave of Covid-19 epidemic coupled with an increasingly illiberal government. This, of course, speaks volumes of the sad state this country has found itself in since the Glorious Leader announced victory in mid-May.

Karl the Komeback Kid

With the return of Karl Erjavec to the helm of DeSUS this past weekend, things are shaping up for some serious end-of-the-year fireworks in Muddy Hollows.

Karl Erjavec featured in a meme. — *Erjavec may have qualities but looking good in a mask is not one of them (source)*

The fact that Komeback Karl made, well, a comeback, may seem a beautifully executed political long-play. In reality, it is anything but. Then again, Erjavec will be trying to milk the situation for all it might be worth. Including making a play for the post of the prime minister.

Janša’s Letter To EU Leaders, Annotated

Prime Minister Janša is in the news again. This time he took it upon himself to write a monstrosity of a letter regarding the latest EU spat over rule of law in Poland and Hungary and the union’s seven-year budget connected to it. In the letter addressed to EU Council president Charles Michel, Janša manages to come across as a spineless toady for Viktor Orbán and Jarosław Kaczyński, a person with serious delusions of grandeur, and a failed metaphor writer, at the same time.

*The letter that even made the Politico Brussels Playbook*

To put it in a nutshell, the letter is yet another shit-show of epic proportions. Not only did Janša copy the letter to every EU leader, as if he’s on a some kind of a grand diplomatic initiative, he did it at the time when he’s got people at home dying by the hundreds on a weekly basis due to Covid-19. And, in a well-executed maneuver of opening mouth and inserting foot, the Glorious Leader is now crying foul over the very same package his own government voted in favour of in Brussels, only days ago. Thus he backstabbed his own diplomatic apparatus for the second time as many weeks.