letter | SLEEPING WITH PENGOVSKY

One Letter, Six Prime Ministers and Half A Million Vaccine Doses

Someone please tell prime minister Janez Janša to stop writing letters. Every time he writes one he sets himself up for a fuck-up of epic (epidemic?) proportions. This time is no different. Last weekend, Janša co-authored a sharply-worded letter to European Commission and EU Council presidents. Therein he joined PMs of Austria, Czech Republic, Croatia, Latvia and Bulgaria in complaining about delivery of Covid-19 vaccine doses, basically accusing Brussels of lack of solidarity.

Photo of letter by PMs of Slovenia, Austria, Bulgaria, Czech Republic and Latvia, asking for more fairness in vaccine distribution — First, there were five PMs. Then, there were six. But in Vienna, there were only four.

Fast forward a couple of days and PM Janša finds himself bitch-slapped by the European Commission, thrown under the bus by Viktor Órban, and in serious trouble at home for skipping on buying available vaccine doses. As a result the Glorious Leader had to change his story as he went along, walk-back his statements and side-step accusations to the point of reaching his daily 10,000 steps and 500 calories many times over.

Janez Janša’s Letter To Ursula von der Leyen, Annotated

Oh, dear. Looks like it is that time of the year again. Birds migrate, flowers bloom and Slovenian PM Janez Janša writes letters to EU leaders. In this case, a letter to European Commission president Ursula von der Leyen.

Beggining of Janez Janša's letter to Ursula von der Leyen — *The letter, as published by the Slovenian governement’s Twitter account*

Unlike the last time around, Marshal Twito’s latest literary undertaking is mercifully light on maritime metaphors but heavy on manipulative bullshit and passive-aggressive abuse. This, of course, means it is time for a new installment of the developing sub-genre, pengovsky’s annotated readings of letters by the Glorious Leader.

Janša’s Letter To EU Leaders, Annotated

Prime Minister Janša is in the news again. This time he took it upon himself to write a monstrosity of a letter regarding the latest EU spat over rule of law in Poland and Hungary and the union’s seven-year budget connected to it. In the letter addressed to EU Council president Charles Michel, Janša manages to come across as a spineless toady for Viktor Orbán and Jarosław Kaczyński, a person with serious delusions of grandeur, and a failed metaphor writer, at the same time.

*The letter that even made the Politico Brussels Playbook*

To put it in a nutshell, the letter is yet another shit-show of epic proportions. Not only did Janša copy the letter to every EU leader, as if he’s on a some kind of a grand diplomatic initiative, he did it at the time when he’s got people at home dying by the hundreds on a weekly basis due to Covid-19. And, in a well-executed maneuver of opening mouth and inserting foot, the Glorious Leader is now crying foul over the very same package his own government voted in favour of in Brussels, only days ago. Thus he backstabbed his own diplomatic apparatus for the second time as many weeks.