Welcome to part three of the fourth Janša government primer. Click here for parts one and two. Both readers can be reassured that pengovsky knows he needs to hurry the fuck up. Things just keep piling up, including but not limited to Bibi Netanyahu starting to collect on his black-cubed debt.
But before we get there, we’ve still got at least two installments of the series to speed-run through. For this part in the series, pengovsky promised Franci Matoz and a couple of randos, but is it actually a bit heftier than that. So, let’ get going.
Slovenia celebrates 35 years of independence today. Yay, us! Events were organised, flags were waved and speeches were held. But in a classic case of plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose, it was also a night for retribution, vindictiveness and exclusion. Because it’s our turn now. That is to say, their turn. Which is mostly why president Nataša Pirc Musar got booed through a part of her address to the nation during last evening’s main celebration.
Team Janša 4.0. Again. Because pengovsky couldn’t be bothered to find a copyleft pic from last night (source)
This is also why prime minister Janez Janša trampled on long-established rule of PM and Prez alternating in delivering these things. Instead, he insisted that they both address the nation. Because that’s just how he rolls. Rules for thee, but not for me. Naturally, the far right element had a lot to say about freedom of expression last night. You know, decorum is for pussies, because fuck your feelings. Needless to say they go apeshit if/when situation is reversed. But through all of this, members of Janša’s cabinet politely clapped their hands. So, let’s go and meet some more of them. (And click here for part 1 of the series.)
The fourth government of Janez Janša is nary a month old and already they’ve earned themselves threereferendumbids, an ongoing criminal investigation (from the before times) and a brazenly corrupt MP, even though he technically is not on the team.
But before we deal with all of that – or at least parallel to that – pengovsky feels it is important to get to know the people pretending to call the shots in version 4.0 of the Janša administration. Because obviously nothing will be done without the micromanager-in-chief’s say-so.
Ten days ago Janez Janša was sworn in as the next prime minister. This made a lot of people in Muddy Hollows really angry and was widely considered to be a bad move. Especially among the dreamers, thinkers, speculative progressives… or, as right-wing pundits would have it, idiots.
However, Glorious Leader updating his Twitter bio was only part of the task. A big part, to be sure, but this is one of those nothing-is-done-until-everything-is-done type of things. And since there is no Janša government without people for Janša to, well, govern, the grand finale started on Monday, with would-be ministers testifying in front of various parliamentary committees. Barring any mayor fuck-ups Slovenia will have Marshal Twito’s fourth government by tomorrow evening.
In a surprise address to the media on Saturday morning, President Nataša Pirc Musar announced she will not be making a PM nomination. Assessing that no candidate can secure an absolute majority in the parliament, she notified Speaker Stevanović (shudder!) that she is so done with this shit, even though she still had two more weeks to come up with a name.
President Pirc Musar announcing she will remain nominee-less (source)
Not to put too fine a point on it, the president fucked up royally. In one fell swoop, she made a huge political error, missed an opportunity to hold parliament accountable, screwed up the messaging (again) and possibly opened herself up to an impeachment proceeding. It is, to use a technical term, a clusterfuck.
If your idea of Santa Claus is a bald guy with a thick Dolenjska drawl who has it in for public media and NGOs, then Christmas is about to come early in Muddy Hollows. Namely, despite claiming the opposite, Janez Janša is on the cusp or forming his fourth government.
Janez Janša and Nataša Pirc Musar, fucking extatic at the prospect of seeing one more of one another (source)
That much is obvious after president Pirc Musar held her first official round of consultations before she appointing a PM nominee. To be fair, no-one has yet secured the 46 votes necessary in the first and second rounds of PM appointment procedure. But with Robert Golob taking a step back, the initiative is with the Glorious Leader. And he sure behaves as if he had already clinched it.
So, yeah, this happened. By now most of you know that SDS, NSi++ and Demokrati backed Resnica boss Zoran Stevanović for Speaker of Parliament. Which is a bit like putting the bouncer in charge of the nightclub. It might look cool but you just know bad shit is waiting to happen.
Zoran Stevanovič doing his best bouncer impression, a day before he got the Speaker job
To say that Robert Golob and GS were blindsided by this is an understatement. They had it all gamed out six steps ahead and were ready for some serious 3D chess. But it all hinged on the failure of the first speakership bid. Imagine their surprise when a disgraced former cop got the nod at the first try and was driven home by his buddies from the police academy.
