Welcome to the fourth and final part of the primer on the fourth government of Janez Janša. As promised, it includes the three remaining ministers as well as the Resnica duo currently rampaging in the parliament. It was about fucking time pengovsky finished this write up, because in the mean time shit in Muddy Hollows was happening left, right, and centre. Well mostly right, but still.
There are two or three referendums lined up. A potential violation of international law. An SDS MEP being kicked out of EPP. Resnica playing even bigger dumm-dumms than they are. And interesting developments in Ljubljana mayoral race. But first, read below or click here for parts one, two and three.
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Polona Rifelj, minister of environment, spatial planning and getting blamed when shit goes wrong
An eminently political appointee, Polona Rifelj could easily have popped up in any other role in Janša’s fourth government. She no specialised knowledge that would qualify her for this portfolio, nor is she a standout Party cadre who would spend years obediently pressing every button the Glorious Leader needed pressed in parliament (see Lep Šimenko, Suzana).
What Polona Rifelj did have going for her is the position of state secretary at the ministry of economy during the Covid-19 era Janša 3.0 government. So, she has some executive experience, which will definitely come handy.
She is also the bosslady of SDS Celje branch which is awfully close to Middleof Fuckingnowhere, Velenje, where the Glorious Leader sleeps nowadays. Admittedly, she does not have the high honour of counting the Marshal among the due-paying members of her particular outfit (that being the SDS Velenje branch) but she is geographically closer to him than any other member of this cabinet.
That said, environment and spatial planning is not exactly a coveted post. Precious few political careers have been made at this ministry but many have been tarnished beyond repair (see Jazbinšek, Miha; obit pending in the next couple of days).
Because when things will go sideways on the second nuclear powerplant in Krško or when additional highway lanes will refuse to materialise out of thin air, you can be sure that infrastructure minister Jernej Vrtovec will be looking for scapegoats fare and wide, with Polona Rifelj being prime candidate.
Mihael Zupančič, minister of justice and swallowing hard
Ah, yes, another portfolio where Demokrati have likely bitten off more than they will be able to chew. Mihael Zupančič had an nice little career going for him in the Muddy Hollows diplomatic service and with a law degree from Sorbonne, he was sure to go places.
Alas, one of those places seems to be the ministry of justice. This is one of handful of portfolios Glorious Leader will be paying special attention to. Which is understandable, given all his rants about the justice system and whatnot.
Thus even though the fight against corruption was very much at the top of Demokrati and Anže Logar agenda, Mihael Zupančič will get his marching orders from Janša and his personal lawyer, who just happens to be minister of the interior. He will simply be expected to swallow hard and get on with it.
For Anže Logar, this will be one more point of political and personal humiliation. But for Zupančič, this will be an object lesson that decades in the civil service, watching politicians trip over themselves, do not automatically prepare you to be a better politician.
Suzana Lep Šimenko, minister for diaspora and getting out of the way
What exactly did Suzana Lep Šimenko do to deserve this plum posting, pengovsky knows not. Being appointed minister without portfoilo in charge of relations with Slovenians abroad is probably the best job in this or any Slovenian government.
You show up to work, check your email, maybe even answer a couple of them and then spend the rest of the day looking for excuses to visit countries that have at least a handful of Slovenians living there. Double points if said Slovenians can form a folklore group or at least play an accordion. And in a show of great political force and clout, minister for diaspora even gets to disburse a couple of million euros to various Muddy Hollows-related cultural projects around the world.
Suzana Lep Šimenko has been a staple of SDS national cast since her 2014 parliamentary debut. As is the custom, she was a loyal and unwavering Party cadre. But she wasn’t really an outstanding performer either. This being her fourth straight term, maybe she unlocked the “become a cabinet minister” achievement.
Or maybe the reason for Lep Šimenko’s skyrocketing political career isn’t her great political acumen but rather the guy who came in after her. Namely, by making the ministerial posting, she had to relinquish her MP seat. You know, the little detail about separation of powers and such.
Thus appointing Suzana Lep Šimenko as minister primarily cleared the way for Luka Simonič, president of the SDS youth organisation to enter the parliament. And at a time when the SDS won as much as a quarter of their vote in the under-45 demographic it just seems good politics to have Party Komsomol chief inside the parliament.
Zoran Stevanović and Katja Kokot, parliamentary bully and his posse
When Janša sent out calls for “development partnership”, offering opposition parties early access to drafting legislation in exchange for good behaviour, GS, SD and Levica told him to go fuck himself and the horse he rode in on.
Resnica, on the other hand, realised that by taking the Glorious Leader up on his offer they could no longer pretend to be an opposition party. Even though they are very much a part of the coalition. Moreover, Speaker Zoran Stevanović and Resnica parliamentary group leader Katja Kokot have absolutely no need for such an agreement.
Firstly, their supply and confidence agreement with Janša ensure they have the Marshal’s ear whenever they need it (or else their five votes could go >>poof!<<). And secondly, in the few months since the inauguration of this parliaments, Resnica filed more batshit crazy legislation than most parties in this decade, combined.
In fact, it in increasingly obvious that the role of Resnica is to be the psychotic bully in the school cafeteria, slamming down random people’s lunch trays and daring them to punch back.
But apparently they forgot that sometimes those to fight back are the ones you least expect.
