sd | SLEEPING WITH PENGOVSKY

The Restaurant at the End of the (Left-Liberal) Universe

The history of every major political party in Muddy Hollows tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why, and Where phases. For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question ‘How can we run the government?’ the second by the question ‘Why do we run the government?’ and the third by the question ‘Where shall we have lunch‘?

Robert Golob hosted leaders of left-liberal parties at a posh restaurant in Ljubljana. Everyone came and agreed to play nice. — *PM Golob welcoming playing host at an admittedly posh restaurant (source)*

With apologies to Douglas Adams, there simply is no better way to describe today’s huddle of the six parties comprising the left-liberal half of the Slovenian political spectrum. To an untrained eye, the lunch date may have seemed like an overture to tighter political collaboration or even semi-unification. In reality, these guys went to lunch because they were hungry.

Stupid Before The Storm: Mother Of All Walkbacks

Slowly, with the speed of a decrepit snail on valium, pengovsky is bringing this blog up to speed all the stupid that happened in the lull before the campaign storm. And at last, we get to take a look at the NATO near-miss that made everyone look up and ask whether Slovenian political class really is capable of handling this sovereign state thingy.

NATO and Muddy Hollows. because pengovsky couldn't be bothered with yet another picture of PM Golob to represent the mother of all walkbacks — *NATO and Muddy Hollows. because pengovsky couldn’t be bothered with yet another picture of PM Golob*

As everyone knows by now, there will not be a referendum on Slovenian NATO membership. There will not even be a referendum on defence spending resolution. In fact, six weeks after nearly sleepwalking into a clusterfuck of epic proportions, people involved are pretending like the whole thing never happened.

Somehow, Robert Golob Made Slovenian NATO Shit-Show Even Worse

Some men are born great. Others achieve greatness. But some are just stupid little shits willing to put national security at stake in a coalition pissing contest. This, is in essence is what Robert Golob surprise announcement of a NATO membership referendum boils down to. There’s a backstory to it, obviously. But for starters suffice it to say the highlight of Friday’s shit-show was entirely due to Robert Golob’s fragile ego.

PM Robert Golob during NATO summing in The Hague. In Slovenia he is looking down the barrel of yt another referendum. This time on defence spending and NATO. — *PM Robert Golob during NATO summing in The Hague (source)*

First, the SDS (predictably) outmanouvered him in the parliament. Then, the SD (also predictably) hung him out to dry on 5% defence spending referendum. And then the Big Bird flew (!) off the handle and made the whole shit-show even worse by calling for a referendum on NATO membership. Talk about shooting your balls off just to prove a point.

Poklukar Vote Results Make For A Shaky Coalition

Boštjan Poklukar will stay on as minister of the interior. At least for now. With NSi taking the lead, the opposition held his feet to the fire yesterday. But in the end the no-confidence vote fell well short of the mark as only 29 MPs voted for his dismissal.

Boštjan Poklukar, addressing the parliament and defending his record as interior minister. SD and Levica abstained, making sure the opposition didn't get a majority on the vote. — *Boštjan Poklukar defending his record (via RTVSLO)*

That said, coalition had its own skibidi moment when they only mustered 35 votes in Poklukar’s support. Meaning that even the GS came up five votes short when supporting their own minister, as SD and Levica said upfront they were going to sit this one out.

Protecting Private Poklukar

Chief of Police Senad Jušić resigned earlier today. And while interior minister Boštjan Poklukar denied it, the move was clearly designed to help save his ass in the upcoming no-confidence vote.

In a bid to save his own ass, interior minister Boštjan Poklukar accepted the - no doubt forced - resignation of Chief of Police Senad Jušić. — *Boštjan Poklukar (right) throwing Senad Jušić under the bus (source)*

SD came out swinging on Monday, saying that Jušić has to go, pronto, and only after that will they consider supporting Poklukar (or not). Not to be outdone in this powerplay, Levica followed suit yesterday, saying pretty much the same thing. While Poklukar can survive both parties’ abstentions, their votes for no confidence would seal his fate.

NSi And Levica Urinating In The Natatorium

The one thing that went slightly below the radar in Muddy Hollows over the past few weeks was NSi and Levica urinating in natatoria. Or, to put in vernacular, pissing in other people’s pools. Not in each other’s pools, mind you. Although pengovsky would pay real money to see that particular shitshow.

Image of Levica and NSi logos in a swimming pool — Juvenile, but it is what it is. Sorry. 🙂

For reasons that are as clear as they are not completely thought out, NSi and Levica decided to do some light incursions into narratives traditionally held by SDS and SD, respectively. Not that nobody noticed. It is more that very few people realised just what exactly both parties were signalling. Spoiler alert: nothing good.