Suzuki is a piece of shit…

Somehow I always picture the scene below taking place
in Springfield Elementary School 🙂

First day in an elementary school somewhere in Midwestern USA…

The teacher introduces a new pupil, Suzuki from Japan. A history lesson begins and the teacher decides to quiz the kids:

Who said »Give me liberty or give me death«
Silence befalls the classroom. Suzuki raises his hand: »Patrick Henry in 1775 in Philadelphia!
Teacher: Very good, Suzuki

Now, who said »Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the Earth«?
Suzuki stands up solemnly: Abraham Lincoln, 1863, Washington
The teacher scorns the rest of the classroom: You should be ashamed of yourselves. A Japanese kid knows more Amercan history than you do!

A quiet vioce from the back of the classroom: »Fuck off, you Jap sons of bitches«
Teacher yells: WHO SAID THAT?!?!
Suzuki raises his hand: General Douglas McArthur, 1942 just before the battle of Guadacanal and Lee Iacocca in 1982 during Chrysler’s shareholder meeting in Detroit.

The class falls silent, but a single voice that whispers: »Blow me!«
Suzuki: Bill Clinton to Monica Lewinsky, 1997 in Oval Office, Washington

Another kid yells: »Suzuki is a piece of shit!«
Suzuki: Valentino Rossi, 2002, during a MotoGP Rio de Janeiro Grand Prix

All the other kids freak out and start a rampage, the teacher blacks out and then the headmaster enters the classroom: »WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING AROUND HERE?«
Suzuki: Prime Minister of Slovenia Janez Janša, Ambrus, November 2006

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Agent provocateur and an occasional scribe.

7 thoughts on “Suzuki is a piece of shit…”

  1. Variacije na temo. 😀 I heard/read this one before on several other occasions as well. But it’s still a good one. Some types of jokes are incredibly versatile. All “Gorenjc” jokes can be applied to Scotish people as well (and vice versa), many policemen jokes to blondes and so on. 🙂

    P.S. Good morning! 😉

  2. Good morning to you too! 😀 Yes, it is a rather old one… But it’s funny how jokes that were popular in socialist times find their way back now, when the Defender of Democracy is in power. Isn’t it ironic? 😀

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